Before you waste anymore of your time or any of your money in this hapless quest maybe you should ask yourself why this is so important to you?

Is it because you heard from a celebrity chef or read a USA Today article that said Pappy was extremely rare, more delicious than the nectar of the gods and now you want to get a bottle to show off and brag to your friends? If so, then I hope that you waste years of your life scouring the earth and may you never find a bottle. Maybe you should spend a little time trying some other bourbons first.

Or

Is it because you love bourbon, you’ve already tried many of the easily-found offerings on the shelf today and you’d like to see what all of the buzz is about and expand your knowledge of the bourbon world? Awesome. There’s a lot of great bars out there where you can buy an over-priced pour of Pappy and decide for yourself whether it’s worth pursuing a bottle any further. You may find out that Pappy 23 is way over-oaked (here’s another secret: it is!) and definitely not worth $250 for a bottle or triple that amount on the secondary market.

Okay, so you actually tried some Pappy at a bar and loved it and you NEED a bottle.

What do you do now?